To start off with the idea that God isn’t generic, I want to throw out some definitions. Anyone else a fan of definitions?
GENERIC: not specific; lacking imagination or individuality; predictable or unoriginal.
Conversely:
SPECIFIC: clearly defined or identified; precise and clear in making statements or issuing instructions. “when ordering goods be specific”; a medicine or remedy effective in treating a particular disease or part of the body; a precise detail. “he worked through the specifics of the contract.”
In scripture we read that God is the same, yesterday, today, and forever, and that is true. His character, His nature, His goodness and His victory can be depended upon 100% of the time. What isn’t generic or always commonplace about God is how He works in the specific situation and details of our lives. He is a LIVING, CREATIVE being who is working just the way we need Him to at that given time.
I am really into textile art and woven wall hangings. I have made some with yarn or macrame at home, but have you ever seen an authentic woven or stitched tapestry? It is beautiful, and has incredible value. What makes a hand made tapestry an expensive piece of fine art? It’s hand made, intricately designed and hand stitched with complexity, individual nuances, and immense care. I’m sure you could buy one that is pumped out of a factory and made to be an imitation of the real thing, but the beauty and uniqueness that gives it it’s value is in each unique stitch that makes up the whole.
In your life as a tapestry God is in each knot, each stitch, each little pattern detail. We have the opportunity to partner with him to draw the value out of each of these moments; to recognize his personal touch as the artist at work in our lives, and believe that He is weaving something beautiful.
I want to tell you about a time I saw the personal nature of God at work in one of the stitches of the tapestry of my life.
Almost 2 years ago now (it will be 2 years in March) we had some company over, and my son Jackson, who was 3 at the time, and a child of a friend were jumping off of our couch onto a pillow. Well, despite having told Jackson that we weren’t going to jump anymore he took one last jump, missed the pillow completely, and landed flat on his belly with his right arm underneath him.
He immediately started crying and saying he couldn’t move his arm. We assumed it was nursemaids elbow which he had 3 or so times in his life, but he wouldn’t calm down for us to check his arm. Joe (my husband) brought him upstairs where it was quiet, and within seconds he called for me. We both looked at Jackson’s arm and knew it wasn’t nursemaids elbow. It looked broken.
I remember going into protective mom mode and making sure our friends could stay at our house with Quinn who was a baby at the time. I remember there were still opened boxes of uneaten pizza on our table as we were running out the door. I remember holding my breath as we tried to get Jackson into the car and somewhat secure in his car seat without causing agonizing pain. I remember laying with his face nestled close to mine on a hospital bed in the hallway after some pain medicine they gave him kicked in as we waited for a room. I don’t really remember taking the X-Ray, but I remember the doctor coming in and saying a lot of words and the only thing that registered was “O.R.”, as in operating room, and “orthopedic surgeon”. I remember this moment of conversation: “Wait, wait, wait…surgery?” “Oh yea, his elbow is fractured in two places, and he is definitely going to need surgery.”
We took him home that night in a splint with surgery scheduled a few days later. Here is the short of it: he had the surgery to repair the two fractures. His surgeon said his case was one of the worst if not the worst she had worked on. It was supposed to be a 90 minute procedure MAX where they were going to put pins in to his elbow and cast his arm. It ended up taking FOUR hours. FOUR.
After the initial surgery he had to keep that cast on for 4 weeks then it had to be removed, the pins had to be removed, and he would get a new cast that had to be on for another 6 weeks. Because of the unexpected amount of pins (6 pins in his tiny elbow), the surgeon recommended removing them in the O.R. again, under twilight stage, which we agreed to. On the day of the procedure the anesthesiologist said he would need full anesthesia even though it would take 60 seconds to remove the pins because little kids usually can’t emotionally tolerate twilight stage. So, he underwent full anesthesia again for the pin removal. All seemed to be healing well, the second cast was removed after about 6 weeks, and the ortho would continue to monitor Jackson’s arm to make sure it fully healed. Weeks of X-rays to follow showed that one of the fractures pretty much hadn’t changed and didn’t seem to be fully healing. After 4 weeks or so she sent Jackson for a CAT scan to get a better image of the fracture. She wasn’t happy with how it looked on the scan, and said she would give it one more week, we would schedule an X-Ray and a tentative O.R. booking for the same day. If the fracture looked the same and wasn’t healed any more than it was, she wanted to another surgery with a bolt that would then require a follow up surgery to remove.
This is about the time I reached the end of my rope, and had a moment of freak out at the thought of my toddler going in for surgery under anesthesia two more times. I decided I was done with fluffy generic prayers, and wanted to hear God’s heartbeat.
See, it can be easy to sense the relational nature of God when you wake up and have your devotional time with Him, or when you are going about your day as usual and conversing with Him through out the day. It can even be easy to recite all the “right” scriptures”, and say or do all the “right” things, all the while completely missing the unique way the Holy Spirit is moving in our current situation and current moment. I wanted and needed to hear or see something unique and personal for Jackson and his healing, and began asking God to show me what He was up to. I knew all of this was not for nothing, so what did I need to know?! FILL ME IN GOD!
Ask and you shall receive. God began to highlight James 1:2-4 in my mind: “Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.” Honestly, I was so bothered by this scripture. I asked God, “How am I supposed to feel joy about this? How am I supposed to have joy when I know you didn’t make this happen to Jackson. You didn’t send this hardship to us. You aren’t happy he broke his arm and it isn’t healing? Why are you asking ME to count it joy?!” After a couple of days of stewing over these questions with God, along with a few other scriptures, I came to a revelation. I remembered a picture I snapped of the decorated ceiling in the hospital room after Jackson’s first surgery, and I determined that God had a miracle for Jackson.
Stay tuned for part 2.
(Top featured image by Erica Camacho @emmeartistry)
(Above image by me)
